Those that played acquitted themselves impressively, but turnout was disappointing. Maybe trivia doesn’t play well in summer.

The winners are the veteran Russ (10+0) and up-and-comer Mike de la Loyola (9+1.) We’d like to welcome Senor de la Loyola to the competition and ask why his downstate posse never take part in the fun.

Johann and MB came in tied for second with scores of 8+1 and 9+0 respectively.

Everyone knew that Dustin Hoffman was our mystery theme.

1.  “(??)  is a truly dreadful film, a lifeless, massive, lumbering exercise in failed comedy.”

Ishtar - I’ve only seen bits of this. It didn’t look that bad.

2. “…plastics, an apt description for the artificial people and attitudes around him.”

The Graduate - and with the initial word of this blurb, the theme of this quiz was given away. Or should have been.

3. “Still powerful story of two losers in New York.”

Midnight Cowboy - one of the trilogy of movies (along with the Graduate and Little Big Man) that established Hoffman as one of the greats.

4. “Milk bottles and related metaphors feature prominently as breast fetish stand-ins, but with a decidedly peculiar asymmetrical preference for just the left one.”

Meet the Fockers - Russ was the only one who knew this. He never misses a nipple reference.

5. “It’s half a brilliant political satire, half a wacky outrageous comedy of errors. The first half works, the second half doesn’t.”

Wag the Dog - Hoff was the funniest thing in this movie. "Grace! Teaser!"

6. “a perfect setup for some funny and provocative jabs at women’s lib, gender consciousness, equal rights, sexual freedom, as well as soap operas.”

Tootsie - I’ve never seen it.

7. “It provides the most observant study of working journalists we’re ever likely to see in a feature film.”

All the President’s Men - I’ve never seen it, but know how it went down.

8. “This excellent struggle of a dad to keep his son by his side is a pure classic, with (him) at his best.”

Kramer vs. Kramer - I’ve never seen it, but still would have answered this question correctly.

9. “Brazenly manipulative Oscar bait — and it worked.”

Rain Man - It gets annoying after repeated viewings, but Valeria Golina’s accent stays hot.

10. “An American classic, (it) seeks to rectify Western history with this engrossing account of the colorful life of 121-year-old Jack Crabb.”

Little Big Man - a very funny movie.

Bonus Question

What role did this actor play on the Simpsons? (I’ll accept either the character’s name or his profession. Either of those two things will be acceptable.)

Mr. Bergstrom, Lisa’s substitue teacher - Johann actually remembered his name.

Victor has been on me about taking him to hear some original live music. The last couple of cover bands we’ve seen have failed to speak to the rock and roll spirit that lives within his soul. I’m betting that the Cynics and the Handcuffs have the chops to sufficiently rock him.

Both of these bands play on Saturday night of the extra-large, two-day American Music Show that kicks off on Friday.

Victor may not be ready to appreciate the twang-and-wit of the evening’s headliner, but I sure will be. As I’ve written before, Robbie Fulks put on one of the best performances I’ve ever witnessed and that was just him and his guitar. He’ll have his band with him on Saturday and I’ve heard tale that their good, real good.

The plan was to take the family down to the show on Saturday, while I checked out Friday’s lineup sans ninos. I missed Dave Alvin the last time he swung through town and wouldn’t make that mistake again. But it seems Tammy will be working so either I take the kids along or you come forth with an offer of babysitting. You can’t do it, can you?

Also playing Friday is a band called the Honeybees, not featuring Ginger and Mary Ann. I’ve heard them on the Sangamon Valley Roots Revival Radio Hour and they kind of hit in that sweet spot where the Ditty Bops always get me.

It looks to be a stellar weekend of music despite the reported scheduling of a Jimmy Buffet cover band somewhere else downtown. Well, dorks like music too so live and let live, I always say.

Here’s your American Music Show lineup for 2009:

Friday

The Honeybees 5PM

Bill Kirchen and Too Much Fun 6:30PM

Dave Alvin and the Guilty Women 8:00PM

The Damwell Betters 10:00PM

Saturday

The Gordons/Tom Irwin 3PM

The Cynics 5:30PM

The Handcuffs 7:00PM

Robbie Fulks 8:30PM

Hillbilly Casino 10:00PM

So, what’s not to like.

I’ve no writing to promote this week, but if you have any ideas for feature stories I could pitch to the paper, let’s hear it.

Trifectas for the Delusional

Have you ever noticed how celebrity deaths always happen in threes . . . and twos and sevens and ones and fours. It’s almost as if they’re random events completely unrelated to each other in any logical respect except in the imaginations of the extremely impressionable. God, it’s so eerie.

Potent Quotable

To mother, on his return from a birthday party at Skateland South:

"I’m really good at skating. I just fall down a lot," V. Naumovich

Baseball: It’s Not That Bad

After the skate party we took in a Slider’s game courtesy of the ole company store. Despite promises of all the free hot dogs and drinks they could stomach, the kids were not excited about this outing. After about a half hour at the park, I didn’t think we’d make it to the ceremonial opening pitches.

Once the game started, however, something strange happened. They settled in and took a genuine rooting interest in the goings-on out diamond’s way. Maria, the most ardent pre-game descenter, was particulary interested in learning the rules and strategies of the game as the action unfolded before her. We made it all the way to the seventh inning before being frightened away by lightning.

I’m on record as not being much of a baseball fan but I’ll admit to enjoying the game as well. It helped that they scored many runs, although we missed the two homers while replenishing with food stuffs. A group of visiting high school students - in town helping with a Habitat house and bunking at Little Flower’s gym - kept things lively with their good-natured antics. The race-confused, alcohol-abusing loud mouths behind us, however, sent us seeking tranquility down the opposing baseline.

Viva Le Futbol

I’d be remiss about saying anything good about baseball without tempering them with a few words about soccer. You’re probably not aware, and clearly do not care, but the U.S. men’s national team’s victory over Spain last week was incredibly momentous. If we were baseball fans, this would have been occasion for tipping automobiles or dragging the sofa from the porch to the street and setting it ablaze. (Yes, I’m aware of the rowdy, oft-times murderous behavior of soccer fans. Indulge me my prejudices.)

Trivia Is Not Trivial

Speaking of the ugly side of competitive endeavors, like many of you Facebookies I’m quite involved with the Know It All trivia series. And perhaps like you, I’ll look and see how I’m doing in the standings against my friendly competitors. I admit that if I’m trying to improve my record against a particular player that I’ll stick to those subjects on which I’m strong. What I won’t do is retake a quiz to improve my score.

I’ve noticed on a couple of occasions that someone who I initially bested on a quiz had somehow, days later, wrestled the victory away from me. The only explanation for this I can think of is that, armed with the correct answers, they retook the quiz. I won’t name names (not you, Johann), but the purveyor of this despicable practice should know that I’m on to his monkeyshines.

Speaking of trivia, response to the latest BFS challenge has been dismal. I usually won’t post results until I get at least ten entries, but we may not reach that level of participation this time. This confirms my suspicion that nobody reads blogs anymore and are instead satisfying their trivia jones on Facebook where they are cheating.

Heard About Your Band

When touring bands stop in Springfield, they normally start their performance at or near the eight o’clock hour. A reasonable time for the concert going crowd.

Local bands start much later. An act headlining a three o’clock bar may not take the stage until well after midnight. This scheduling costs them a segment of the music-loving demographic, most notably, me. But even those with the ability to stay awake past 11:00 might be more amenable to an earlier starting time so that they can enjoy the music and then go out and do whatever it is people who aren’t sleeping do at three in the morning.

Tammy went to see a band, the Graduate, last evening and I would have liked to have heard them as well. But I’m wise enough to my ways to realize that after an entire day shuffling the kids around and then an evening at the ballpark, that slumber could not be denied. It’s sad, really.

Speaking of music, I’ll be back later this week to promote the American Music Show, year after year, the finest lineup of music that Springfield has to offer.

Here’s the latest round of trivia. I’ve included snippets from reviews for ten different movies, you have to guess the movie that each review was directed at.

But wait, there’s a common theme at work here. Each movie is included the oeuvre of one of our finest living thespians. Once you figure out who that actor is, the answers will be much clearer.

Thanks to Rotten Tomatoes for making this an extremely easy category to write.

(As always, your responses won’t appear in the comments section until the contest is over.)

1.  “(??)  is a truly dreadful film, a lifeless, massive, lumbering exercise in failed comedy.”

2. “…plastics, an apt description for the artificial people and attitudes around him.”

3. “Still powerful story of two losers in New York.”

4. “Milk bottles and related metaphors feature prominently as breast fetish stand-ins, but with a decidedly peculiar asymmetrical preference for just the left one.”

5. “It’s half a brilliant political satire, half a wacky outrageous comedy of errors. The first half works, the second half doesn’t.”

6. “a perfect setup for some funny and provocative jabs at women’s lib, gender consciousness, equal rights, sexual freedom, as well as soap operas.”

7. “It provides the most observant study of working journalists we’re ever likely to see in a feature film.”

8. “This excellent struggle of a dad to keep his son by his side is a pure classic, with (him) at his best.”

9. “Brazenly manipulative Oscar bait — and it worked.”

10. “An American classic, (it) seeks to rectify Western history with this engrossing account of the colorful life of 121-year-old Jack Crabb.”

Bonus Question

What role did this actor play on the Simpsons? (I’ll accept either the character’s name or his profession. Either of those two things will be acceptable.)

Usually when my column runs on a holiday I’m oblivious to the fact and instead write about something stupid. But this week I saw Father’s Day coming and wrote appropriately. Here’s to all you non-deadbeat dads.

Speaking of Father’s Day, here’s a picture of my haul. Homemade cards and contraptions. The good part, it didn’t cost me a penny. Speaking of which, here’s a link to the column I wrote for SpringfieldMoms.

Honey, I Shrunk the Tabloid - Fans of the venerable Sunday magazine will have noticed that it’s been cut down in size. Fortunately there was still room for Walter Scott to inform us of Miley Cyrus’ future projects and it looks as if she’ll be graduating to more mature roles until her fan base outgrows her and then Walter will stop returning her publicist’s calls.

If you arrived here via Firefox (you’re not really using Explorer, are you?), download the Cooliris plugin and you too will be amazed at the way it browses through photos. Do a Google image search of your favorite celebrity to ogle and then let Cooliris do it’s magic. Captivating!

I’ve come to realize that despite all of his corruptiness, Blagojevich was just too stupid to have screwed up the state’s finances so horribly and that Madigan may be the biggest culprit in the continuing budget problem. It’s all just a power game to the state’s leaders, but as the one who plays it best, Madigan is also the most to blame.

After spending the weekend at the water park and the swimming pool I’ve come to the conclusion that no matter who you are or where you’re from, deliberately splashing water in someone’s face is a punk move on par with shooting someone in the back or slipping iocaine powder in someone’s drink without first issuing a challenge to a battle of wits. I’m trying to teach my kids that to do so is to disgrace the family.

I’ve also come to the conclusion that I got a hold of a bad batch of sunscreen. Despite frequent applications I’m fried and considering litigative action against the makers of said faulty sun block. I’m hoping that a Sierra Nevada Pale Ale will counter the painful effects of the sun’s harmful rays. Milford would be mighty disappointed in me.

I’m working on another trivia quiz. Look for it soon.