Category: nonsense

Turns out there is a Santa and the Tooth Fairy is real. BFS regrets the error. »

First I blew Santa’s cover with this column that sent my daughter into a tailspin of doubt and confusion. Then I let the Tooth Fairy out of the bag with this story* on two dentists. It’s clear that my writing should be kept away from children, even though I pen nary a vulgarity nor do [...]

What’s this? A blog post? »

Don’t be a boor
My column this month is on practicing etiquette in everyday situations. The proper thing for you to do, gentle reader, after carefully considering my words, is to write a comment congratulating the newspaper for publishing such wisdom and suggest that your life has been made the better because of it and perhaps [...]

Could You Launder One Million Dollars? »

Here’s the scenario:
You’re hiking or biking through a wooded area when the call of nature strikes. Miles away from a restroom, you decide to venture off the path and seek a secluded spot to tend to matters. You eventually settle on a spot beneath an interstate overpass.
After finishing up, you notice a leather satchel [...]

Tautiška Giesmė »

I was roundly mocked when I took to the Bocce Ball field on Saturday evening, this despite my earlier display of prowess. The "Lithuanian Master" they called out, derisively. Well, I promised that I wouldn’t boast, but rest assured that when darkness fell, the ridiculing had ceased. Join me, won’t you, in a rendition of [...]

Riddle Me This »

If you catch this wave, the longest you can go is one hour, 40 minutes and 39 seconds.